Discovering motivation is like finding the keys to a place of magic—a place where effort feels effortless, motivation appears naturally, and force transforms into flow. In this sacred space, your life’s purpose can be revealed.
This is the story of how I unexpectedly found my way into that hidden chamber.
In 2008, I became curious about the rise of social media after logging into Facebook. In a few minutes after creating an account and entering some basic information such as the college I went to, I was instantly connected to my colleagues I hadn’t seen or heard of in over 30 years.
Instant global connection to a past tribe and time seemed a bit magical. That curiosity and observation became compelling and I sensed that this was a game-changer.
The next step was to sign up to Twitter (someone with an “X” fetish changed its name recently) and I started to engage with people online in 140 characters. As I was in Sydney, Australia and most of the audience was in the USA, I could see America wake up as they came online on Twitter in the morning.
This was my late evening. Being a night owl allowed me to watch Americans wipe the sleep from their eyes, sip coffee in front of their screens, and go from dazed and sleepy to conscious.
The curiosity about this new technology turned into a slow burn that became a compulsion. The next step was to start writing about it on a blog.
I then shared my writing on social media about what I was observing and learning. My simple blog posts gained some attention. People thanked me for writing an article. They commented and re-shared.
I started to get some visibility online. I managed to creep up to 10 views a day and then 50. I was receiving affirmation. It was a simple virtuous loop. Write, share and be noticed.
I didn’t know then how powerful that simple feedback loop was. It lit a fire that flipped a switch. It’s affirmation.
What is affirmation?
Affirmation is where your actions are reinforced with positive reinforcement. The feedback tells you that you are on the right track and moving in the right direction and builds confidence. It is motivating and affirming.
In the past and “Before Social Media” (BSM) if you wrote a book it would take years before the writing received affirmation. Today you can write a blog post or post a video and instantly receive likes and comments.
Affirmation on social media
Affirmation on social media is motivation on steroids.
And is revealed in several ways with interactions that provide validation, positive reinforcement, and emotional support. Social media platforms amplify the effects of affirmation by offering users instant feedback from a wide audience.
Social media platforms amplify the effects of affirmation by offering users instant feedback from a wide audience.
Here’s how it manifests:
- Likes, hearts, and reactions (Instant validation)
- Comments and positive feedback
- Shares and reposts that provides social proof
- Follower growth and engagement metrics (quantified validation)
- Viral Content is a type of supercharged validation where you see your attention spread like a wildfire globally.
The combination of all these psychological elements via the global social media platforms in real time provide a “Dopamine Effect” with “Social Media Affirmation.”
This is neurological affirmation in almost its purest form. The instant feedback loop of likes, comments, and shares triggers the brain’s reward system, releasing dopamine, the feel-good chemical. And like any well designed drug it can be hard to ignore.
Affirmation on social media has the power to be a launchpad for success. Take Justin Bieber, for instance. He began as a kid uploading videos of himself singing cover songs on YouTube. The positive feedback he received from early viewers caught the attention of music producer Scooter Braun, leading to a record deal and global superstardom.
Similarly, Shawn Mendes followed a parallel path, gaining fame on Vine with cover songs that went viral, leading to millions of followers and ultimately a major recording contract. Their stories show how validation from an audience can fuel creativity and open doors to opportunities that were previously unimaginable.
Why it matters
As humans we need and secretly crave affirmation. And social media can do that in an instant. This reinforces a desire to seek further affirmation by posting more content, checking for new likes, and staying active on social platforms.
This virtuous and also dangerous loop is addictive as we always want more attention and affirmation. We now live in a world where the cult of celebrity puts celebrities on pedestals and bows down to them as gods.
Going deeper
The key elements that provide affirmation to humans, fueling motivation and action, can be distilled into several psychological and emotional drivers:
1. Recognition and validation
Humans are motivated by external validation, such as praise, awards, or positive feedback from others. This provides a sense of accomplishment and reinforces a belief in one’s abilities.
2. Progress and achievement
Seeing measurable progress or achieving small, incremental goals creates a sense of momentum. This fuels a desire to continue, reinforcing motivation and action.
3. Sense of purpose and meaning
Feeling aligned with a deeper purpose (e.g., a cause, mission, or personal value) gives motivation a powerful, intrinsic dimension. Purpose-driven action feels more fulfilling and meaningful, which makes effort worthwhile.
4. Autonomy and control
Humans feel more motivated when they have control over their choices and actions. Being able to direct their own paths or feel empowered leads to more engaged and sustained action.
5. Belonging and connection
Social affirmation from a group or community provides a sense of belonging. Whether from family, friends, colleagues, or a community, this emotional connection motivates individuals to take action and remain engaged.
6. Positive feedback loop (The virtuous cycle)
Affirmation often leads to confidence, which encourages more action. Successful action results in further affirmation (e.g., recognition, progress, validation), which further strengthens motivation. This self-reinforcing cycle can create a virtuous loop: success breeds more motivation, which leads to further success.
Being aware of these psychological drivers can help you tap into them for building motivation to create a full life. Joseph Campbell discovered his purpose during his lifetime.
He took his childhood curiosity of American Indian myths and stories that became so compelling that he distilled them into many books and led to his creation of the framework that was unveiled in the book “The Hero’s Journey.” That book became the inspiration to George Lucas writing the film play and the movie “Star Wars.”
His simple answer to motivation was distilled into this 3 word phrase – “Follow your bliss”. But he lived in a simpler world where social media hadn’t been invented.
Once you’re in the virtuous loop, social media affirmation can fuel your creativity and help you make a real impact. Just look at Lilly Singh, who started her YouTube channel by posting comedic videos. The positive feedback she received motivated her to keep creating, eventually landing her a late-night TV show.
Then there’s MrBeast, whose constant pursuit of bigger and better content fueled by the endless cycle of likes, views, and comments led him to build a brand that now spans millions of dollars and philanthropic endeavors. These creators are living proof that when you stay in the virtuous loop, your work can grow and inspire millions.
Is your affirmation a “virtuous loop” or a dangerous addiction?
When the various affirmation elements are continuously met, they tend to form a virtuous cycle that motivates us to create, publish and share, or at its worst a vicious circle and addiction that stops us leaning into life.
But many of us are addicted to our phones watching a virtual world while the real world passes us by. “Smelling the roses” is replaced by Watching the Jones’ small lives on a small screen. No meaningful work has been done but your attention has been stolen.
The virtuous loop
Positive affirmations create emotional rewards (dopamine, a sense of fulfillment), which increases motivation to act, creating more opportunities for success and further affirmation. And the virtuous loop applies more to the creator stepping and sharing their art with the world.
The loop is particularly strong when the individual:
- Receives consistent recognition or validation
- Feels that their actions are contributing to a meaningful goal
- Gains a sense of autonomy and connection in the process.
The good side of this loop is to step into creating content and art that matters and sharing it with the world. This motivation can end up providing a body of work that can change the world and motivate a tribe that craves your art.
The vicious and addictive cycle
But what happens when the pursuit of affirmation takes a darker turn? When we aren’t creating but instead find ourselves endlessly consuming, lost in a sea of content? This is where the vicious and addictive cycle begins.
I’ve seen it happen first hand—both in my own life and in the experiences of others. Moments when what began as a source of inspiration and motivation slowly morphed into something far more destructive.
For me, it wasn’t just about sharing anymore; it was about chasing those likes, those comments, those quick hits of dopamine that would light up my brain like fireworks.
I remember catching myself checking for updates almost obsessively, feeling a sense of unease when the notifications were quiet. Was I still relevant? Was my work still resonating?
For others, it’s a similar story: creators who started out passionate, driven by the thrill of sharing their art or ideas, only to find themselves burnt out and disillusioned. The constant need for affirmation becomes an addiction, pulling us into the comparison trap.
You see someone else’s post go viral, and suddenly, your own success feels insignificant. Instead of staying grounded in your creative journey, you get lost in the numbers, craving more attention, more validation, and losing sight of the joy you once had in simply creating.
Even creators like Charli D’Amelio, who skyrocketed to fame on TikTok, have spoken about the pressures that come with being at the top. The constant need to please followers and maintain their attention can turn into a heavy burden, where success is no longer fulfilling but rather a source of anxiety.
The addictive nature of affirmation pulls creators deeper into seeking validation instead of focusing on their creative purpose.
This cycle doesn’t just rob you of your creativity—it can chip away at your mental health. You might find yourself questioning your worth when the likes don’t come, when the comments are few, or when the engagement drops. Anxiety creeps in.
The pressure to perform, to constantly create content that pleases others, becomes overwhelming. And that’s when the danger lies—affirmation becomes a double-edged sword, a force that can propel you forward but also drag you down into a spiral of self-doubt and exhaustion.
So, what can we do to break free?
Practical Steps for Maintaining Balance
The key to avoiding this vicious cycle is to remain intentional with how you use social media. It’s crucial to remember that while affirmation can be motivating, it shouldn’t define your creative process. Here are a few steps you can take to maintain balance:
1. Set intentional goals
Define what success means to you beyond likes and shares. Is it producing work that feels meaningful to you? Is it connecting with a community? When you anchor your creative goals in something more substantial than external validation, it becomes easier to stay grounded.
2. Affirmation detox
Take regular breaks from social media to reconnect with your core motivations. Step away from the noise and spend time creating offline. Use these breaks to reflect on why you started creating in the first place and to ensure that your creativity isn’t solely fueled by external affirmation.
3. Mindful creation vs. consumption
Become aware of how much time you spend creating versus consuming. Ask yourself: are you actively putting your work out into the world, or are you getting lost in endless scrolling? Set boundaries for yourself—limit the time spent passively consuming content and refocus that energy into mindful creation.
4. Build a supportive circle
Surround yourself with a community that values and supports your work beyond the metrics. Having people who appreciate what you create, not just how it performs online, can help you stay connected to your purpose and remind you that your work has value, regardless of the algorithm.
5. Reflect on your affirmation needs
Why do you crave affirmation? Is it rooted in insecurity or genuine desire for feedback? Understanding your own psychology can help you approach affirmation with more awareness, avoiding the slippery slope of addiction.
The bottom line
Motivation through affirmation is a two edged sword. And social media cuts two ways.
Social media gave me global attention to my writing. It took me around the world speaking at international conferences. I received instant affirmation and motivation to keep writing. It lit a fire that changed my life.
But if the affirmation of some online attention diminishes your life by stealing your mind and time then you have landed on the wrong side of motivation via affirmation.
So…do you want to play the system or be “played by it”? Do you want to be a creator of information and content that matters? Or just a scrolling dopamine hunting consumer of information that doesn’t matter?
The post The Surprising Link Between Social Media and Unstoppable Motivation – Is It Real? appeared first on jeffbullas.com.
* This article was originally published here
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